When you make a decision to have a child you're also making the decision to take responsibility for that child. You don't abandon your obligation as a parent because you have "other plans". I'm over deadbeat parents!
Narcs flip between ‘Poor Me’ and ‘The Intimidator’. Poor Me gets sympathy and drains power from her listeners. The Intimidator crushes the other person verbally or physically. And the narcs who feed on others for power can flip between the two.