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Symbol for Marriage Funny Dark T-Shirt by CafePress

Symbol for Marriage Funny Dark T-Shirt by CafePress

My dear 9 year old who often doesn't like to take the time to eat...(I don't get that either....)

hangry: a state of anger caused by lack of food (i'm def no fun when i'm hangry!) This is funny, i thought this only used with my Family!

Oh apps. You served your purpose for a bit.

Whenever I delete an app on my iPhone, the shaking icons make me feel that they're panicked over who's getting cut from the team. --I will never look at that the same

Always the issue when they tell me "say when"

Wine fun fact we all should know. Drinking wine can improve your sex life. Red wine keep us looking younger. Italy is the world’s top producer of wine.

I don't think people realize that i would truly wear glitter every single day casually. :)

Glitter is my favorite color! David told me glitter was my favorite color almost two years ago!

I wasn't that drunk last night

I wasn’t that drunk last night! Dude, you congratulated a potato for getting a part in Toy Story!

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It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces.then I must have some serious skill :D

Not going to lie, I do a happy dance in my head when...

Funny Confession Ecard: Not going to lie, I do a happy dance in my head when I see stuck up bitches from high school being all fatter than me. So true

I keep meaning to get back to the place I donate money to every month, but that ice cream sure sounds good...

Just kidding I'm on my cupcake. Just kidding I hate cupcakes. Just kidding I live for cupcakes. Just kidding I live for veggies. Just kidding veggies make me sick. Just kidding millennials make me sick.

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